Monday, October 22, 2012

Imprints. Letters From Deep Within

I can't deny that my heart is still weeping on the inside for him. Either that or it's the beer solitude that's speaking. Anyhow, my body longs to fall into rhythm in his arms, like how we once used to under the moonlight by the bridge. It was a beautiful night. How I dearly miss swaying in the night with him, flowing to the silent music in our souls. It was a magical moment that I still cherish, one that I bring up in my raw moments, spent all alone, just reliving in my head, of what used to be. All that's left of a beautiful memory. How I dearly miss, of what we used to be. Together, it was a most precious feeling. I still weep, I realize. Even after I tried so hard to move on. Maybe all I need is to find something better in its place, and then the hidden pain might go away forever. I have long denied myself of admitting this, but writing all this down, I realize the truth of my feelings. He's still there, but we can't prolong this beautiful dance any longer. Oh what used to be. My heart still weeps for it, even after decades of trying to move on. I can just wish that I'll move on from the memories that I was lucky enough to experience, move on to even more beautiful things. I must not be sad. I must be thankful, and happy, that I got to experience something as wonderful as dances under the moonlight, serenaded by the music in our hearts. Moving as one, to a beautiful rhythm. Once I let go completely, then I guess better things will come my way. I must stop sabotaging myself. I don't want to miss out on life. My dear, you still have a lot of growing up to do. And I'll always be there for you, even when everyone else has disappeared. Hush now, and rest in peace. Hugs and kisses.

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