Human Parasites

I realize long ago that I have been living like a selfish child, only interested in improving myself, and clueless to what's been going on in societies around the world. I'm ashamed to admit that I still feel like I'm living selfishly, which is why I'm really hoping to broaden my perspective and consciousness, to what's going on with the world. I feel empty, and I have a feeling that's caused by the selfish lifestyle and mindset that I have. It's all about me, me, me - how I can get a better job, improve my looks, who I can hang out with to avoid boredom and depression, etc. But that's the thing about depression and that empty feeling inside, I'm sure one would feel more content and at peace by doing good deeds, especially making useful contributions, even more so when they're done to help others. I've been thinking about this for quite some time, and I realize I'm starting to get tired of living selfishly. I know I feel good after doing small deeds to help other people out, because it rests in peace on my mind knowing that someone's small burden has been eased a little. What more if it's a big contribution? Won't that feel more wholesome?

I came across this saying twice already, and it rings so true: What you do for yourself is gone after you've died, and what you do for others remain a legacy.

Speaking of legacies, some people told me that's the reason why they want to have children - to continue the legacy of their family. I think leaving behind a legacy in society as a whole, is better than a comparatively small familial unit. Think of the bigger picture. When you do something useful to contribute to society, it will affect your family, since they will be within that scope as well (unless you ignore them in the process). I don't intend to forgo them, but to include them as well.

I have no idea what it is that I'm 'destined' to do, but I know that I'm currently broadening my mind, to arm myself with knowledge and wisdom, to see what's going on in the world, to find out where I can fit in to start contributing on a massive scale. I've always thought of doing something, but I've never really done anything about it unfortunately.

I'm tired of feeling like a useless blob of existence, another parasite among the human race. I noticed that most people take and take, including myself, and that a comparatively small percentage of people actually do something to give. It's time to take action. Research and development is on the way. I know I'd be so happy and be able to remain happy once I've found my cause.

In the meantime, I'll do my best with the small steps. One particular thing I have in mind is to smile more and be a more positive presence around people. Our presence and the way we carry ourselves affects the people around us, and I would love to be the one that's affecting others in a good way. It may cheer someone up, make a tiring day less dreary perhaps. At least it's a small step to make someone's day. I don't want to be that stressful or depressing presence anymore. Time to change things up around here. I can do this! So can you, if that's your cup of tea as well, lol.